I'm not as mentally strong this week as I have been. I am hearing the voice of reason in my head saying "don't eat that - you don't need it" but i'm not listening. I think a big part of my problem is i'm not getting enough sleep at the moment with packing and sick kids, but I should be stronger than this after 3 months of healthy eating.
I was hoping this slump was going to be short lived but its entering its second week with no signs of letting up. I don't want to gain weight or lose fitness because I have my big reveal in 30 days and I want to look fantastic ... I don't feel fantastic at the moment. I feel like a worn out frumpy Mum again (I was going for 'Yummy Mummy', or the 'oh wow you have three kids!') and I was actually surprised this morning when I tried to pep myself up with a body scrub to notice how skinny my body is. Mentally I feel like I am the same physical shape as when I started the 12WBT - despite the fact i've lost 8kg and 30cm!
I should be energised and enthused but instead i'm feeling flat. The voice of reason is trying to pick me up but is struggling under the weight of apathy, exhaustion and disappointment. I know I shouldn't be disappointed but I am disappointed that I have not made the regular exercise routine stick. I have been eating well but I am not recording my calories and I often eat 1200-1500 calories (plus coffees) which I think is maintaining my weight and energy levels but I worry that 1500 will become 1800 will become 2100 before I realise it. I know I could stop it but the inner pessimist has found something to latch on to and is not helping things in the least.
I think I should go for a run to work off some of my stress, I have an appointment I need to get to for my kids soon so I'll try for that this afternoon. I need to start kicking my arse into make-up exercise sessions during the day so I have less disappointment on my shoulders ... hopefully that will kick me out of my slump :)